glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
So much Jack, so little girl.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
