Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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