If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
