hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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