took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
