So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
