I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
