No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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