did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
