Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
