The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I wish i was in the wii world.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Randomize
