I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
