who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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