i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
