just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
