first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
