Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
