Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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