i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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