So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
