im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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