hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
