absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
