I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
either way he was missing a nipple.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
