So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
