the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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