I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
