I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
If I had your ass I would rule the world
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
