Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
