Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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