I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize