Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize