there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
