The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
