garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Everything about him screamed your future.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
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