Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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