I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I think people are normalizing furries
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
