how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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