i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
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