Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Randomize
