are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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