I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
i think i just lost a toe
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
