Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Randomize
