She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
