new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
