i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
