Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I didn't notice because vodka
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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