U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
