Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
