he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
