After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Randomize